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Depressive Blows and Enraged Overreactions

Updated: Sep 14, 2019

Ketamine treatment number 6 has been completed. Number 5 held up for a good 8 days and then I could feel the depression creeping back in. It took about 3 days before I was back into my full blown depression. Oh, how fun treatment resistant depression is (not to mention, bipolar as well). As I had a full 2 weeks between treatment 5 and 6 we decided to shorten the time between treatment 6 and 7. This time I will only wait about 9 days between treatments in hopes that we either beat depression to the punch or are able to cut it off before it has a chance to grow out of control.

I found it interesting, though. I was reflecting back since the time I started my Ketamine treatments. I used to have moments of uncontrollable rage, caused by my thoughts moving too quickly, where often times my fist would end up in a wall or a door. The pain of hitting something helped slow down my thoughts and gave me the ability to focus. I realized, however, that since starting Ketamine I have not had one of these episodes. Being bipolar, I am already prone to stronger reactions and I actually messed up a tendon in my hand earlier this year after one of these mood episodes. So needless to say, it appears that my depression and my hand are getting some relief from Ketamine.

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